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Highway to a Husband

How to Live the Life You Desire: Highway to a New You!

By: Julia Yarbough
April 9, 2014

Someone please pinch me so I can be sure I'm fully awake and not living in a dream! Most mornings when I wake up that is exactly what it feels like. Once I roll up, brush the 'sleep' from my foggy mind and have my coffee I look around and ask, "Is this really my life?'s real." And I am sooooo very THANKFUL to everyone who has crossed my path, who is in my life now, those still yet to come and The Universe for putting me exactly where I am in this moment. All I can say is... WOW!

Why all the mushy talk? Because I want all of you to know and understand in your hearts -that WE REALLY DO HAVE THE POWER TO CREATE THE LIVES WE WANT! Here's how I know...

highway to a new you, book, julia yarbough, silva harapetian, authors, single, dating, relationships, amazon, book sales, nabjI'm excited to announce that Silva and I have written, published and are unveiling for all of you our new book - HIGHWAY TO A NEW YOU!  It has been a labor of love. Our epic road-trip was just the beginning of what has been nothing short of a miraculous life journey. We give THANKS to all of you who rode along with us and helped us grow.  We knew there was something bigger we were supposed to learn from our experiences - something MORE than just finding Mr. Right. (I believe he'll come along soon enough...) So as we reflected on our journey, the adventures, the people, places and events, we realized there was SO much about LIFE we gained from the HIGHWAY TO A HUSBAND experience. What we discovered was a road-map to figuring out who we truly are and what we truly desire out of life. The result - our guidebook of practical steps anyone can take so you can begin to create the life you want - HIGHWAY TO A NEW YOU!
Changing your life is as easy as believing it's possible and ordering your copy of HIGHWAY TO A NEW YOU!

What Silva and I like to call our FOUR GUIDELINES FOR LIFE are outlined in Highway to a New You! We've talked about it before but once we began applying the principals and actually living them - our own lives began taking on new dimensions, fulfillment, happiness and success, each in our own unique ways. We believe anyone can do the same thing with their lives and we want to share what we've learned:

Be Change
Be Authentic
Be Fearless
Be U!

Since making the commitment to practice these guidelines I can tell you, it feels as if I have a magic wand in my hand at all times. What do I mean by that?
At the start of 2014 we talked about believing that DREAMS DO COME TRUE. I'm here to tell you the simple shift in perception of believing - 100% - that you really can create what you want - is in fact true. We spell it all out for you in Highway to a New You!

Later this week I will share with you some of the super cool people events and  activities which have all come into my life over the past three months. An exciting new doorway is opening up and when we all decide we want to step through it - the sky is the limit to what will come. I hope our ongoing journey will help you truly know and believe - there are no coincidences nor accidents. I can't tell you how exciting it is to watch the positive effects of living by our guidelines and we're more than thrilled to share it with all of you!

And I would like to thank the incredible individuals along the way who have helped make our journey possible and to our Jazz in the Gardens Women's Conference presentation team -- Marcia Barry-Smith, Matthew Levy, Terrence Thomas - you all made the public unveiling and launch of Highway to a New You! special!

After you've read your copy of Highway to a New You! we want to hear from you - your thoughts, comments suggestions and of course, feel free to share your personal stories of change!

Who knew where the Highway to a Husband journey would lead? But isn't it exciting??


Be Change: TV Producer Follows Her Passions To Open New Doors

By: Julia Yarbough
February 5, 2014

How often do you find yourself questioning the choices you've made in life? Choices affecting your health, lifestyle, relationships and career? Since I began this Highway to a Husband journey a major by-product of the experience has been to open up all kinds of proverbial "cans of worms" making me (and by default many of you) a bit more reflective. I often struggle with the feeling that my personal and professional decisions go too far against the grain and often wonder if I'm on the right path. Are there are others overcoming the same challenges? Yes, it seems there are!

To honor these "mavericks" I'm introducing a new addition to the HTAH platform. I will  share with you stories from individuals also taking a leap of faith to Be Change in their lives. I believe the more we stay true to our own path, the more likely our Mr. or Ms. Right will cross that path!

Veteran New York based television and social media producer Deborah Mitchell, owner of Deborah Mitchell Media Associates is embarking on a trip of her own. She's doing it in Fearless fashion proving that none of us know exactly where the Highway will take us, we just have to keep driving!

Julia: What was your "original" career and at what point did you make a change to move in a different direction - what happened that forced that change?

Deborah: I was a television producer for over 25 years having worked in different genres over the years. I got my first television job at "Essence, The Television Program" while in my junior year of college. I went to school at night to finish my senior year and worked at Essence during the day. My next big job was at the start-up of Geraldo Rivera's daytime talk show. The show lasted for eleven years and so did I.
I worked as a field producer, studio producer, supervising producer and eventually ended up on-air as Geraldo's co-host for four years. Two years after the show ended I landed at CBS News in 2000 as a producer for their morning news show "The Early Show" which was hosted by Bryant Gumbel and Jane Clayson. At CBS I covered everything from breaking news to lifestyle segments for a decade. In 2010 new management came in and I my contract was not renewed. Once out of the network I had a chance to take a look around and while job hunted realized the communication landscape was changing. Social and digital media were the buzz words and I had to find out how to be apart of it. I reconnected with former CBS anchor Rene Syler, now a successful blogger and TV personality, took a few social media seminars and hired a private tutor to help me navigate the new space.

Julia: What exactly are you doing now and how does it compare to your previous work life in terms of your emotions, satisfaction, income difference, sense of accomplishment?

Deborah: I officially launched Deborah Mitchell Media Associates (DMMA) again last year. After a failed business partnership in 2012, I realized that having my own company was the best way to go for me. DMMA is a television and social media management company that allows me and my team to organize, coordinate and execute a vision for television, live events or online presence by incorporating social media.  Since I'm a bit of a foodie I take a special interest in working with chefs and food brands and connecting them with an online audience.  I'm still producing just now using my old school skills with new media tools. As for the income, I'm not making television money these days. But I'm enjoying my life. While the money I earned in television was great, I sacrificed a lot of time and my life. I worked so hard I never had time to spend the money, which turned out to be a good thing since my savings have come in handy during this transitional time.

Julia: What is your biggest fear moving forward from your "safe" career and lifestyle?

Deborah: The funny thing is I am not afraid. I believe that I've been training for this new chapter all my life. Sometimes I miss having a steady paycheck and being able to plan my vacations and save regularly, but I think that one day I will have that again.

Julia: What advice can you give others who are considering a change but are too fearful to make it?

: If you want to make a change, plan for it, financially and emotionally.  This year marks four years since I was let go from CBS. I'm single with no children and was able to take a little time to figure things out. Surround yourself with supportive friends and family. A lot of people are fearful and can't be supportive so you may have to leave them behind.

Julia: Would you say your life is better, worse, or simply different than before and describe the changes?

Deborah: I would say my life is just different. Since leaving television I've actually slowed down quite a bit and made time to enjoy myself and take better care of my health. I have a regular yoga practice now.  I love to travel and used to travel extensively when I worked in television but now I have to budget carefully and set my priorities.  Being an entrepreneur can be costly so I've put regular vacations on the back burner for now.

Julia: What has been THE MOST SATISFYING moment of your "new" life?

Deborah: The most satisfying moment of my "new" life is realizing that I am right where I am supposed to be at this time in my life. I really believe that things happen for a reason. Losing my traditional television job four years ago was the perfect time for me to join a new wave of media, spread my entrepreneurial wings and be in better control of the next chapter of my life.

Congratulations Deborah! Enjoy the Highway


TV/Social Media Producer Debbie Mitchell is an Emmy nominated producer who is a member of the Producers Guild of America (PGA).  She is currently a member of the James Beard Broadcast and New Media Awards Committee. If you are interested in “ Book Case TV” or are a brand interested in Social TV, blogger outreach campaigns, or a blogger or personality interested in television placement follow Debbie Mitchell@SocialTVDeb and/or email

Do you have a Be Change story you'd like to share? Contact me at:

9th Annual Jazz in the Gardens: Highway to a Husband® To Present at Women’s Impact Luncheon

By: Julia Yarbough
February 2, 2014

Trust The Process

In the past year that saying has become my mantra. Repeating it over and over and sharing it with others reminds me that we are all part of something much larger than ourselves. When we learn to let go and simply ‘trust’ amazing things begin to happen. After all - isn’t that what guided our every move along the road trip? Consider this:

The Highway to a Husband® journey came into creation as a result of my trust that if I did what I could to change my odds of meeting more single, eligible individuals that maybe I would find my Mr. Right. That hasn’t happened - yet - but along the way we were able to share with you perhaps one of the best adventurous years EVER! As far as the Mr. Right, I think maybe I came close. Not all the stars were properly aligned to make that last big relationship hold firm as “the one.” But I know I'm moving toward something and someone so perfect for me I can almost feel it! So the figurative journey continues...

However, something different but equally incredible and amazing has happened as a result of the search for Mr. Right. For those of you traveling vicariously with Silva and I then you have no doubt watched our personal evolutions along this road of life. I hope you have also been motivated, inspired and "driven" to take some of our life lessons (even the harsh and painful ones) and use them for your own benefits. I know many of the comments, input and suggestions from all of you has been taken to heart and I thank you for that.

I’m happy to share that our ability to impart nuggets of wisdom to even more women (and men) not only continues but is expanding in a way I had not imagined. Mark your calendars, because next month, Friday, March 14, 2014, Highway to a Husband® will present a seminar session at the 9th Annual Jazz in the Gardens Women’s Impact Luncheon and we’re expecting several hundreds attendees!

When we set off on our epic cross-country road trip my only goal and vision was to return home having found my Mr. Right. Wow - sounds so naive now, doesn’t it? We’ve learned and accepted there is sooo much more involved in finding romance and making it last with most of it emanating from our own thoughts, words and actions (more on that soon).  Still we continue to learn and help others navigate. Silva and I have experienced so many twists and turns, ups and downs and exciting new opportunities as a result of this journey, that as I sat meditating this morning the larger reason for this journey became clear to me: we are supposed to help others. Everyone is going to go through the challenges of life, love, family, relationships, etc. But as journalists and compassionate storytellers I believe our calling is to use what we've experienced to assist others make sense of and enjoy the journey along the way.

Joining the Jazz in the Gardens Women’s Impact Luncheon confirms that theory. We are honored to be a part of something which I know will be powerful and allow women (and men) to walk away with some new and applicable tools for getting the most out of relationships and life. Our HTAH team includes Holistic Health Practitioner Terrence Thomas, Executive Management Coach Matthew Levy and Financial Motivator Marcia Barry-Smith. I’ve pulled these experts together as they all speak to the very topics which allowed me and Silva to have the blessed opportunity to take our 10 months cross-country road-trip and then effectively process all the emotional tidal-waves that came crashing to shore as a result. Who knew HTAH would have so many profound effects on us and others? I envision many more such sessions taking place across the country in the coming months, reaching even more people!

Trust the Process and approach every day keeping these items in mind:
1. We may not always know why we’re doing something.
2. We may not know how we’re going to execute and bring it to fruition - yet.
3. We have no way of knowing the outcomes but don't let fear of the unknown stop you.

Trust the Process - you are on the right path!


Six Months to Live: What Would You Do?

By: Julia Yarbough
January 28, 2014

Hello friends and HTAH family!

Let me ask you something. What would you do if you were given three to six months to live? All of us like to believe we’ll be around a good long time. But what if you KNEW your days were numbered? How would you choose to spend them? Queen Latifah’s hit movie “Last Holiday” comes to mind in that a misdiagnosed terminal illness propels her to do all the things she always wanted to do. The result? She creates the life she had always dreamed of living, including dating the character played by LL COOL J. It also brings to mind an experience early on in this journey as we watched Fate snatch away the life of a pilot and his wife.

So in keeping in line with the Dreams Do Come True theme and taking time to reflect during the Venus in Retrograde period, I gave myself that challenge: approach life in six month increments and examine what choices I would make regarding how I spend my time, with whom and identifying the items most important to me and my spirit. The exercise was quite telling.

I also posed that questions to a wide network of friends and family which garnered a HUGE response:

“I'd spend the remaining time with daughter in tow, and we would travel to India julia yarbough media group, tanzania, photography(spiritual retreat), then to Tanzania (wild animal safari), go to remote villages and build homes, feed poor people, then we travel to Galapagos Islands... Visit those few friends & family, and share experiences... Come back to the states, rent a big ass Winnebago and pack Fam & friends and tour the USA...all the while documenting on video.” ~ David

“With my son and my Mom. The people that I love and that love me the most in this world.” ~ Felicia

“Well if I had $, take friends and family on a world tour. At the end it would end like at the beach, sunset drinks nurse and one last glance at what was. Funeral ashes scattered over Molokai.” ~ Darrell

“I would drain my 401k and other investments and travel first class to many places and spend every waking moment with my son. Oh, and I would eat bad food!” ~ Ro

“would eat eat eat! Eat whatever, whenever. Work? Psshhh. Bills? Pfft psshh. And I would throw a hugeeee party. Elephants and jugglers with free food trucks. Oh yeh, sex.. Lots and lots of sex. (Sorry I'm not deep like the others lol)” ~ Jarrod

Several people asked, “Julia, what would you do?” Like many I would first spend time with my mother and close family members going down memory lane and saying goodbye. Next up - same thing with my inner circle of close friends. Then I would set off on another massive trek traveling to as many of the places on my “to do and see” list (Australia, Morocco, Chile, Iceland to name a few) and sharing those experiences with others via stories, photos and videos.

What’s the point of all this? Get out there and live your lives - the rest will fall into place. The more we face our deepest fears and simply act - and do something - and when we bring our thoughts, words and actions into alignment with what our hearts are telling us the more our lives will look and feel like what we desire. I’ve had to face the fact that my desire for a life partner is not yet as strong as my desire to adventure and experience 'new experiences.'

Many of you told me early on in this journey, Mr. Right will find me... not the other way around. That is perhaps the lesson I’m supposed to learn. Mr. Right is simply still on his journey of evolution and growth. When we’re both fully formed we'll recognize one another. Nonetheless, we started something incredible with Highway to a Husband and I believe this journey is meant to continue in order to help all of us lead more fulfilling lives in whatever fashion or form that takes.
This journey will lead all of us exactly where we are supposed to be and with whom.

Your three to six months start now. Go!
Need guidance getting started?
Do these post help inspire and/or motivate you?
I want to hear from you! Email me at


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Dreams Do Come True - How to Make Anything Possible

By: Julia Yarbough
January 21, 2014

Hello my HTAH family and friends!

highway to a husband julia yarbough africaNow that we’ve all had a few weeks to get into the groove of 2014, I figured this might be a good time for an overview of the events of 2013 which have brought us to this point and the life-lessons learned from each.

I've realized this journey isn’t JUST about finding Mr. or Ms. Right, it’s also an ongoing discussion about building stronger and healthier relationships in all areas of our lives.

Let’s reflect and then talk about the dreams you have put into motion for yourself. If you’re having trouble getting started - I hope these examples will help inspire and motivate you. I can also work with you one-on-one to assist in the DREAMS DO COME TRUE process. Remember - ANYTHING is possible when we put our minds to it.

1. So we're up to Summer 2013. Once again finding myself flying solo and still reeling
from the Bama-era and asking myself "what the Hell just happened to me?" While I believe in constantly moving forward the thought of dating made my skin
crawl. So I did what I do best- threw myself into work. The skills
acquired from creating our HTAH platform and believing that anything is possible helped me pull off two successful and environmentally positive events for youngsters.

Partnering with Wyoming-based NOLS- National Outdoor Leadership School, more expedition denali, everglades naitonal park, julia yarbough, producer, speaker
than a dozen South Florida kids visited Everglades National Park for the
first time as part of Expedition Denali-10,000 Steps. A few weeks later, partnering with Tennessee-based Youth Diving With a Purpose, community youth took part in a hands-on introduction to scuba-diving.

*Lesson: when we follow our dreams and passions we can help others achieve theirs.

2. By Late Summer 2013 I wondered if perhaps there was something wrong with me.
Still no dates and still no desire. Just an internal feeling I was supposed to
"do" something - but what? Writing from the heart had become almost traumatic. The skin-crawl factor was in full effect. So I asked The Universe repeatedly for guidance. julia yarbough, guy rawlings, danielle knox, journalist, anchors, reporters, wtvj, nbc6, highway to a husbandWhile attending a journalism conference (great seeing colleagues Guy Rawlings and Danielle Knox) I also
met a dynamic young woman who just happened to be a follower of my Highway to a Husband journey. She owns her own cosmetics firm.

"Hi. Aren't you Julia Yarbough?" She asked.
"Yes, that's me," I smiled extending my hand for a shake.
"You're the Highway to a Husband" lady! She enthusiastically replied. "I've been reading your blog for a long time... What's going on? Where have you been? I have t seen any updates for a long time?"
I apologized for my absence, explained the emotional "goo" I found myself in
and thanked her for her support.

"Well, you are such an inspiration - to change your life like that and just take
a chance - wow, I admire that. I feel like I've learned so much," she told me.

So there I was still having a little pity-party, and this incredible young woman was
telling me she had been looking to me for inspiration.
Had she been put in my path as a sign? I believe she reminded me that this journey and my destiny isn’t just about finding Mr. Right - it’s about helping others! I'm convinced that my "Mr. Right" will materialize when we're ready for each other.

*Lesson: pay attention to the seemingly random events and chance meetings in your life. Those people and events happen for a reason and it all happens to teach us lessons. It's up to us to learn.

3. Fall 2013. Visions of having a successful date crossed my mind; maybe even
hitting the dance floor again - but no. Skin was still crawling. I began to wonder if I would bounce back; was all the change I had created, the facing my fears and the trusting in the process a crock of you know what!?

Trying to make myself feel better and regain my “trust” I flipped through a Luxury julia yarbough, africa, producer, speaker, ethiopiaResorts of the World catalog dreaming and playing "what if.”  A five-star hotel in Addis Ababa, Ethiopia caught my eye and I visualized what it would be like to stay there.

It was as if The Universe rewarded me for having faith and once again DREAMING. Like magic, within two weeks of this little game I received a phone call from a colleague. A major global corporation was looking to contract me to produce a documentary in.... AFRICA! I would spend several weeks in Tanzania, Ethiopia and Kenya. Would you believe the hotel  we stayed in Ethiopia was The EXACT SAME PROPERTY! Chance?

To add icing to this already incredible cake, I was able to revisit the women in Nairobi, Kenya I had worked with in the Spring of 2012. (And remember - THAT trip materialized after having passed through Bozeman, Montana on the HTAH road-trip) Nothing is by chance.

*Lesson: Each of us has the ability to CREATE CHANGE. What we think, say and do creates a ripple effect for our futures. Adopt a few regular exercises and you'll be amazed at the changes you start to see materialize in your life.

So tell me - what dreams have you set into motion for yourself? Need help with the process?  Email me at


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Venus in Retrograde Starts The New Year

By: Julia Yarbough
January 6, 2014

Happy New Year to all my virtual family and friends!

Wishing all of you a fabulous year ahead with much laughter, health, success and yes, LOVE.

Where did 2013 go? It was a year filled with plenty of life lessons, emotional growth, julia yarbough, brian niles, ge, africa, canonmeaningful work and travel (an incredible journey to Africa I want to share with you). I must confess I am thrilled to have a fresh, clean slate as we move forward into 2014. The New Year always arrives with such anticipation and hope of all things GOOD and EMPOWERING!

So with that in mind, I thought this would be the perfect time to bring y’all up to date, share with you some exciting new developments AND... give you a heartfelt warning in matters of the heart and pocket book.

Let’s start with some tips on protecting your emotional world:

How many of you are aware of the astrological circus taking place in The Universe venus in retrograde, highway to a husband, julia yarbough, producer, blogger, public speakerright now known as VENUS IN RETROGRADE? A friend recently brought me up to speed on a little-known phenomenon which takes place every 18 months and we are right now smack-dab in the middle of VENUS IN RETROGRADE; December 21, 2013 until January 31, 2014. What is taking place in the Heavens could reportedly wreak havoc on our personal and financial lives if we don’t pay close attention.

VENUS IN RETROGRADE is a time when the planet Venus, which rules those aspects of our lives affecting romance, love, our values, social relationships, beauty, art, money and financial security appears to be moving backwards in the sky. It’s NOT - it’s simply more of an optical illusion. Even so, it’s a time when things have the potential to go haywire in our lives.

Whether you are single, married, in-between, male or female -- pay closer than usual attention to your thoughts, feelings, actions, reactions and interactions with people (especially potential romantic partners). Venus with her tricky ways theoretically shouldn’t affect me TOO much. In fact I am choosing to spend this time “reflecting” given I am just now, FINALLY coming out of a long and difficult recovery of healing from the emotional scars left behind by the BamaBoy era. (The good news... the stitches put in to close the open cuts and gashes have healed nicely.)

1. Here’s my unsolicited LOVE advice: lay low. Hold off on making big decisions involving loved ones, friends, family and especially romantic partners. It's probably not such a good idea to start or end a relationship and marriage during this time is apparently out of the question! My friend who alerted me to VENUS IN RETROGRADE says she knows of at least three couples who broke up in the past two weeks! Coincidence?  Hmmmm....??

2. Here’s my unsolicited MONEY advice: spend this time researching whatever your heart desires... homes, cars, vacations, jewelry - whatever. But, HOLD OFF on making any major purchases. The planets could be messing with your sense and sensibilities. I would hate to have you drop some serious cash on an item this month, only to discover next month you HATE what you bought. But if you do - don’t say I didn't warn you!

3. Here’s my unsolicited BEAUTY advice: research new looks, hair color, clothes and even home decorations but DO NOT make any major changes to your appearance or living space during this time. You may THINK a bright red "unique" hairdo will look great on you to start 2014. But let's be honest ... it probably won't.

Okay, enough astrological Mumbo-Jumbo. You get the idea. So, WELCOME BACK everyone and I am THRILLED to have you with me as the Highway to a Husband journey continues. As we kick off 2014, I’m excited to say this journey has put my life on such different course than I planned when I hopped into the Xterra for the crazy road-trip and crisscrossed the country. Good times, for sure... but that was just the beginning!

This week I’ll give a brief catch-up and overview of what has been happening and what is on tap for 2014. We'll have some new voices joining the family to capture various stories, striving to bring you more video options and creating a slightly new look and providing a broader selection of life-perspective stories which I hope will help and enlighten all of us in different ways. Most importantly, let me say THANK YOU for believing in me and this crazy vision! And if you've enjoyed this ride and learned anything along the way, I want to hear from you! Tell me how HTAH has helped you? Tell me what you would like to see more of? Tell me your ideas of making this life-altering journey the BEST EXPERIENCE FOR ALL OF US!

I invite you to take to the Highway, come along for the ride, experience the moments right alongside me and I promise... we are all going to continue to learn and grow. I still believe LOVE and ROMANCE is to be had for all of us and more than ANYTHING I know we are going to HAVE FUN!

Happy New Year  - 2014: BRING IT!


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Motivational Life Lesson - Know Yourself Radio Interview

By: Julia Yarbough
August 7, 2013

Never underestimate the impact your actions, words and life experiences can have on others. That's one of the biggest lessons I've learned these past few weeks (10 to highway to a husbandbe exact, but who's counting...) since what I call "The Bama Implosion II."

Turns out, while I was AWOL sifting through my own muck and licking my wounds (again...) many of you who have followed, supported, joined and rooted for this Highway to a Husband journey to have a happy ending, or at least result in a stronger understanding of romantic relationships, were kinda wondering what happened? Where did those girls go?

It also happens that upon mentioning my journey to other single, professional women who had not yet joined the movement, one was so captivated and inspired by the Highway to a Husband concept, she wanted me to share my experiences with other women; via a radio show. I was reminded of just how much taking this risk in life was helping others.

That's one incident which helped kick me out of my 'woe is me' mental state, shake off some of the negative residue lingering from "The Implosion" and once again embrace my original goal: to not only learn about myself, hopefully connect with my "Mr. Right" and to motivate others to be the best they can be in their lives; thereby attracting the kind of LOVE they desire and deserve.

So - thanks to Debra Toomer with
WMBM Radio for the chance to share and find a new wave of inspiration - NEVER GIVE UP! Enjoy.

Listen - then tell me if Highway to a Husband has helped inspire YOU to go after what you desire in life...


Vulnerable Choices

August 4, 2013
By: Julia Yarbough

Hi folks!

~ It’s been way too long and my sincere apologies for having gone AWOL. TOTALLY NOT ACCEPTABLE to disappear from my own blog but I’ve had good reasons. Seriously. I’ll catch you up in the next few posts and I think sharing will help me make sense of the events of this year and I'll explain what motivated me to return to the saga.

On one hand I am more emotionally exhausted and confused than ever yet, I am also more convinced than ever -- events really do happen EXACTLY as they are supposed to. The Universe ALWAYS has our best interests at heart. I Trust the Process at all times!

Where to start, where to start?? Oh gosh... 2013 has been challenging on many different fronts... Okay, I’ll just dive in.

So, when last we chatted - I was spending a little bit of time with Mr. Celebrity. Let me just say, it was short lived - about 5 weeks - and I quickly discovered Mr. Celebrity was quite frankly - ODD. Sure, he had millions and access to a life most of us can only dream about but he kind of creeped me out. Not to mention, I realized seinfeld highway to a husbandhe didn’t remember my name! WTF!?? Okay, that was really funny in that Seinfeld episode when Jerry couldn’t remember his girlfriend’s name. NOT SO FUNNY in real life! I guess when the little details of your  own life are handled by others, who needs to remember something like the name of the woman you’re trying to date? WTF!

At about the same time Mr. Celebrity had appeared on the scene, I also had an unexpected and rather jolting blast-from-the-recent-past. Are you sitting down?? You ready?? Out of the blue, at the end of 2012, who should reach out to me?? BamaBoy!  I know, I KNOW I was bowled-over by it also. After the way we melted-down and ended our emotionally volatile and rocky relationship, I was more than a little surprised to hear from him. Why I even responded ... I’m not quite sure. I’ve asked myself that question countless times in the past few months. Thinking about it gives me a headache and makes my stomach hurt.  Excuse me a moment - I feel queasy.

Where were we?  Well, In a nutshell - here’s what happened. I’m not sharing details because quite frankly, the entire ordeal sends me into a tailspin. But... Bama reached out to me. I was open to listening to what he had to say. He asked me to go dancing and just like the first time around I fell for it. After all, it was on the two-stepping Country dance floor that we met, clicked and fell for each other. (Who knew when we snapped this photo the guy in the orange t-shirt next to me - Bama - would play such a pivotal role in my life??)

So when he expressed interested in wanting to reconnect I did some serious soul-searching. I asked myself some tough questions and made myself answer those questions honestly. Truth is...I had missed him; missed his son; and despite our differences and difficult moments, I had to admit to myself that I loved him. I decided I owed it to myself; to him and to the “what-if’s” of a relationship, to give it another go. So we did.

I jumped in 100%. I made a decision to NOT blog about our progress, not wanting any outside forces to affect the outcome. I made a full commitment to Bama and his son to give them my time, focus, energy and to put the concept of a ‘family unit and family life’ above everything else. Now, for some women, this might come naturally; it might be the thing they’ve been waiting for their entire lives. For me...this was a CHOICE... and one I had to work at, but it was a choice I made because I believed me and Bama were stronger than our differences; stronger than all the naysayers. I was wrong. OH SO WRONG!!

The second time around started out great - movie dates, dancing lessons every week, warm hugs and smiles, dinner nights at home with the little one, a snorkeling trip, a journey into the Everglades and me even walking the little one to school in the mornings (something I quite enjoyed, actually). I even attended a school function in which the little one had to make a presentation; I started crying during his big moment! Yep; I had missed them a great deal - including Bama’s Southern twang and his wacky Country euphemisms. On some twisted level I even missed the subtle ways he irritated me with his constant fussing about every little thing that pushed him even remotely outside his comfort zone. I realized that’s just who he is and it was part of the man I had fallen in love with. He seemed more at ease with life; with us; with who I am. NOT just the surface - but  the real ‘me’ and that helped me lower my walls. Somehow, it seemed Bama and I had come full circle - had found each other again and were on track to carve out our own unique path. Again - how wrong I was.

While I was visualizing what our lives might look like moving forward, a few things were obviously happening in his head that seemed to have triggered a Jekyll-Hyde turn-around for Bama.

1. I went back to work - full-time as a Media Relations Specialist. Bama seemed happy for me but also expressed concern that we would now have to coordinate schedules. He said to me, “I don’t want to be one of those couples who has to plan every bit of free time.” (News flash: that’s reality for working couples. Then I learned Bama had never been with a career working-woman - I was the first and only. I think that revelation explained a lot of why our relationship and interaction had always been so taxing)

2. The tenants in my house stopped paying rent. I evicted them; decided to move into my home. At first Bama seemed excited; even dove in to working on house repairs and upgrades. But a few weeks in - he expressed frustration that visiting me at my house required too much driving and time on his part. (News flash: It’s the same distance for me to drive to stay at his home...about 12 minutes) More on this later, as it leads to an entirely new topic...

3. As a woman who is guarded and admittedly has a hard time expressing my deepest emotions, I faced my fears and told Bama I loved him; that despite our trials and tribulations I always had and never stopped. He simply looked at me with a blank stare but didn’t say a word. Within a week of me offering such complete vulnerability - he emotionally closed down; became withdrawn and sullen and began pushing me away - the Bama I broke-up with decided to return. (News flash: Julia - wake up!)

I know many of you might be saying, “Julia, you idiot! Don’t you remember what happened the LAST time you were with Bama? How it ended? What were you thinking???”

Well, what I was thinking was this: ‘What if we could overcome our differences? What if we could find a middle ground? We obviously have something for each other that is strong enough to have brought us together again and I do love him and I do love his son... so I am going to do everything I know how to do to meet him in his needs and wants and make this work, because I WANT this to work.’

That’s what I was thinking. I was wrong...


Huffington Post Live - Failure to Launch with Highway to a Husband

By: Julia Yarbough
May 8, 2013

OMG I have missed all of you! What can I say... life has kind of gotten in the way of all the fun and games and freedom of the past three years. But I PROMISE...I will be rejoining you because there has been soooooo much happening with both Silva and I we don't even know where to begin!

Some good, some bad, some interesting, some challenging, but ALL exciting and opportunities for growth and change - and you know how we are big fans of always living outside the box and embracing whatever change comes your way!
Are we single? Are we dating? Are we continually learning? Hmmmmm....???

So, take a look at this interview I recently took part in, sharing my thoughts relationships, marriage and what helps add to a supportive, loving partnership.

After this, we'll get caught up and folks...I STILL need some guidance and advice. Why, why WHY - do relationships require so much work???? Ahhyyya - ya- ya!!!

Celebrity Status: World of Decadence

By: Julia Yarbough
March 13, 2013

“You have a man?”

“Uh, no.”

“Good. Because I’m going to date you!”

And with that, began a month long odyssey into a world unknown - a world of no-budget spending, VIP access, opportunity, decadence. It was several weeks in which what felt like the forces of good (staying true to my own needs, wants and expectations from a man) and evil (the opportunity for expensive dinners, exotic excursions, last minute possible whirlwind trips around the country and late-night parties with those with deep pockets) were at odds - battling it out in my head and heart. Was this what Lifestyles of the Rich and Famous was all about, I asked myself??

Folks, I couldn’t make up this story and life experience if I tried!

It started innocently enough. A few weeks before Christmas I took my mother to lunch. We decided on a local Chinese restaurant I had never been to, situated in an upper-sale community; home to many wealthy individuals and a handful of celebrities and athletes. That day, as me and mom sat there enjoying our Kung Pao Chicken, in walks perhaps one of the most well-known residents: a retired pro athlete known the world over. Seriously -  he is... GLOBALLY FAMOUS!

Well, you know me. I’m not one to be wowed by the bling-bling and flash. Whatever.

Mr. Celebrity sees us, walks over to our booth, gives me the once over, then sits down. We engage in polite chit-chat, when he says to my mom...”Can I date your daughter?”  Mom looked at him with that... who the hell ARE you look, shrugged her shoulders and continued munching on her lunch.

“Why don’t you rejoin your group of family and friends and we can talk after lunch?” I suggested. Mr. Celebrity had come in with an entourage of people, so I assumed he was enjoying their company. It seemed rude to ditch them and come chat with us - perfect strangers. Mr. Celebrity then says, “Stand up. Let me take a look at you.”

What?? Normally, I would have ignored such a request, but I admit, I was a bit flattered by the attention so I did as told. (Again, that is soooo not like me!)  Mr. Celebrity gave me the up and down once over, a nod of approval, and declared, “Yep, I’m going to date you,” turned and walked off.

Hmmm? What was I to make of this exchange? I have to admit, my curiosity was piqued. After all, this guy is A HUGE CELEBRITY! My brain did a flash-roll of possibilities: I could be with him at premier events. I could travel all over the country and world with him. I could partake in fun in the sun excursions on his yacht (which he casually mentioned is kept docked behind his home). I could, by default, easily propel myself into another world, simply by being photographed at a ritzy New York, LA, or European event with this man, and he telling people, “I’m dating her.” Could I possibly end up like one of J-Lo’s boy-toys, thrust into celebrity lime-light simply because they are “dating” her? Wow - crazy! Life had the chance to change in an instant. My head was spinning; buzzing with all the what-if’s that COULD and MIGHT happen if I was willing to simply let my guard down a little and go with the flow.

I decided to roll with it. Playing it cool, I gave Mr. Celebrity my business card. I figured if he was serious, he would now have my number and like any man, if he TRULY wanted to pursue, he would call. End of story. Or so I thought.

Next morning, I wake up and check my phone. Turns out someone sent a text at 2:39 AM - it was an unfamiliar number. My gut told me Mr. Celebrity had indeed reached out. Out of curiosity and a little bit of excitement, I returned the call and sure enough - it was him! I confess, my heart raced a little. Wow - here I was... world famous Mr. Celebrity calling little ‘ole me!  We chatted a few minutes and then he told me, “Meet me for lunch today.” I said yes. That required me to make a few changes to my schedule, but what the heck, right? I figured it might be worth it, so I re-scheduled my appointments. Adventure awaited!

But just behind the surge of excitement and thrill of the unknown and the possibilities, was a little voice of doubt and caution. Here’s why...

1. Mr. Celebrity had more or less ordered me to stand up so he could get a look at me. Sure, a brief moment of flattery, but consider what that action may indicate of how this individual approaches and treats women.

2. Mr. Celebrity did in fact keep my number and contacted me, but he did so at 2:39 AM. In this day of technology and instant gratification, have we perhaps become to comfortable with individuals overstepping the common lines of courtesy. Ladies - if a man calls you at 2:39 AM - is that a proper approach with a lady who expects to be treated like a lady; with respect?

3. Mr. Celebrity didn’t ask me to join him for a lunch date, he told me to meet him. Subtle difference, but there it was.

What do you make of this and how would you have processed this first round of interaction?

There’s more to this story and I'll catch you up. No, really! I know, I've been noticeably absent, but all I can is... The Universe has been throwing me some major curve-balls since the start of 2013 - phew! But what fun life can be when you see it all as an adventure full of crazy events and characters

So, have you ever found yourself in some type of odd-ball relationship situation that leaves you baffled and lost? Need assistance in navigating through your dating/relationship needs? HTAH is here to help you - ask me how!